Stone Art

Let me start his off by saying, "What the fuck?" The box he's standing on says "Stone Art," but I see no stones nor do I see any art. I'm sure after reading this there will be some people out there that are going to hate me for pointing out all the misleading points in this guy's presentation, so in advance I'm just going to tell you to shut the hell up and stop wasting your time trying to get me to show sympathy for the performer's mistakes. Anyway, there are two major flaws in this "Stone Art" performance, both are pretty obvious, but I'm sure most people out there will not even realize them.

Let's start off with the first point, "Stone Art." Where the hell is the stone? I see no stone anywhere. I see a man failing to impersonate a stone, but I see no stone. "OMG! There's a stone right over there on the ground!" If you just thought that to yourself, get the fuck off of my blog and never return. This man dressed up in an all grey outfit, standing completely still, is a good impersonation of a stone. I'll give him that, he has the balls to stand on a fucking box all day for a few dollars. Not many people are willing to do that, let alone get a real job. His "stone" impersonation is going great, but as soon as someone drops some change in his box, he starts to move. Okay, I don't know what kind of world the rest of you guys live in, but I have never seen a stone start moving unless some outside force interferes with it. Immobilization is good; movement is bad, very bad. Other than his movement as a "stone," are the clothes he wears. Why the fuck is some of his apparel silver?

My second point, "Is he a stone-man or a fucking robot?" Every time he moves he makes a fucking robotic buzzing noise. What the hell? Seriously, get your act straight; stones don't make any sound, let alone sounds that robots make. I wonder if any one has ever realized any of this before. The case is probably not because people are too busy taking photos and pooling all their money together so they can dump it in his bucket so he can give them a lollipop or a kiss on the hand.

If this was truly "Stone Art," he would stand there the whole day without moving, just like a stone. He will not use the restroom and refrain from moving at all costs whether his bucket of cash gets looted or if someone were to punch him in the dick. And on top of it all, he will not make any robot sounds. If I were to ever met a "Stone Art" guy like that, I'd fucking throw my wallet into his cash bucket.

Get back.